I get a fair amount of email. Most of it is shit, but the real ones I get are hella cool. My gator hatin’ buddy Catfish, sends me a ton of the funniest shit I can’t read at work, ’cause I’ll get fired if I do… Here’s one that come in today. I don’t usually post Cat’s enlightenin’ correspondence, but this, well, to me, and others like me, it was too damned good not to… The only thing I’m wonderin’ is where do I sign up? Anyway, here it is.

Special Forces

The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the U.S. REDNECK SPECIAL FORCES (USRSF). These 500 volunteers from Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Louisiana, Missouri, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas, Tennessee and North & South Carolina boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given only the following five facts about terrorists:

1. The season opened today.

2. There is no limit.

3. They taste just like chicken.

4. They don’t like beer, pickups, country music, or naked women.

5. They are responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.

The mess in Iraq is expected to be cleaned up in about a week.